Light Refreshments Served

There But for the Grace of God . . .

Emily July 3rd, 2008 " parenting mistakes   "justice

You probably heard about this. A woman in Clearfield, Utah, left her baby in the car while she ran in to a friend’s house “for a couple of minutes.” The car was hot, the two minutes stretched to two hours, and the baby suffered a heat stroke and died a few days later. Terrible, terrible tragedy. And now it looks like they’re going to charge the mother with “negligent homicide,” and she could end up spending a year in prison.

What I wonder is what they hope to accomplish by this. Do they want to make this woman and other mothers think twice before leaving their babies in hot cars? Don’t you think the death of the baby accomplishes that objective already? Obviously, if the mother had been thinking clearly, she wouldn’t have forgotten the baby in the first place – and if her brain wasn’t fully engaged, it’s hard to imagine that the fear of being charged with a crime would kick it into gear more adequately than the fear of harm coming to her child.

This saddens me so much because I know how hard it is to be the mother of a small child, and to drag that child around on a hot summer day. I know what a relief it might seem to leave a child sleeping peacefully in the car for just a minute while you ran in to talk to a friend. I know how fast those minutes of precious conversation can slip past. And I can’t imagine the remorse you would feel when you suddenly came to yourself and realized that the baby was in the car.

All I’m saying is, in the course of raising five children, I’ve had my negligent moments. Somehow, I’ve been lucky enough not to have them result in lasting harm to my kids, but they could have. And if they had, no punishment society could inflict in such a case would have come close to touching the pain I would be feeling already. Is it really necessary to compound this pain? Is this maybe a case where mercy should override “justice”?

1. IamLoW says:
   
   July 3rd, 2008 at 1:49 pm

   You are so right, there is no such thing as accidents any more. It seems someone HAS to be charged with something. It’s worriesome.

2. kiersten says:
   
   July 3rd, 2008 at 1:49 pm

   I completely agree. I am so sad for this poor mother, and although she obviously made a mistake, I can’t imagine that going to jail will ever come anywhere near the guilt and pain she must be feeling. And it’s not like she’s ever going to forget and do it again. Furthermore, I read that she has another child. Sending this mother to jail will only harm her other child by depriving it of its mother.

3. jer says:
   
   July 4th, 2008 at 7:12 am

   I can sympathize with this mother, having young children myself, however imagine what havoc it would wreak on the justice system if we just started “deciding” who should receive mercy over punishment. Maybe it is punishment enough for her to lose her child, but where do you draw the line? If she doesn’t receive any punishment, all of a sudden it blurs the lines of all sorts of other crimes. What about the person who shakes their baby to death in a moment of weakness? Or the serial rapist who was horribly abused as a child? I admire the compassion you have for this woman, but we also don’t know the particulars. (Well, I guess I should speak for myself–I don’t know the particulars.) It’s possible that she might be a pretty negligent mother. Maybe her other child would actually be better off somewhere else. I’m kind of playing the devil’s advocate here. It’s an interesting topic to discuss.

4. IamLoW says:
   
   July 4th, 2008 at 1:21 pm

   But jer- the law does do that, they decide all the time when to charge and when to show mercy. There was just a case of a mother who was a school teacher and in the rush of the morning left her baby in the car. They never charged her. It just happens less often lately and that’s sad. I’m grateful when the system does NOT charge everytime and takes it case by case, that’s how it should be. It never should be across the board.

5. jer says:
   
   July 5th, 2008 at 10:33 am

   Yep. That’s what I meant. It’s up to the law to decide what kind of mercy she is shown. I’m sure she’ll suffer the most from the natural consequence of her actions (losing a child) but usually the law gives some type of punishment for death by someone else’s hand, which in this case maybe would be considered negligent homicide. I just meant that she will probably suffer some legal consequence because that’s the way the law works. How much she is given–ten years versus probation, for example–is what the law decides. I know this stuff happens every summer, and it breaks my heart for the child and the parent. Anyway, I’m sorry to get off the subject of Emily’s original post.

6. IamLoW says:
   
   July 7th, 2008 at 9:42 pm

   I don’t think we are off topic at all…. What I am saying is that there isn’t always a charge at all, no probabtion, no ten years, no charge. But it rarely happens any more. It seems like lately heads will roll, someone will be found at fault. I find that sad and scary and I think we should all be concerned. Some times it IS just an accident. We don’t have to find blame every single time.

7. Mhef says:
   
   July 11th, 2008 at 10:25 pm

   I heard about this and felt instantly sick inside. How horrible to realize how much time had gone by and then to have the consequence be so so terrible.
   But the thing that comes to mind as far as her potential sentence is the difference between a consequence and a punishment.
   The consequence of this woman’s action is losing her child, it isn’t a punishment for it. Punishment comes from the law and any sentence those representing the law deem fitting. They are different though they often get blurred, especially when such an emotional event is involved.

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment. First time users must register before logging in.