Back in my dating years one of the qualities I looked for in a husband was that I wanted somebody who knew how to work hard, but also knew how to play; I didn’t want to marry a workaholic who couldn’t define himself outside of his job. Well, I found him. Cory strikes a very good balance between work and play – his golf game is almost as respectable as his work ethic and I don’t have to worry about what he’ll do after retirement. Sometimes though, sometimes I worry that he might be more in tune with his inner child than might be healthy.
A few days ago Drew was playing at a friend’s house when he called and asked if they could come back to play at OUR house. Cory was confused. After all, Drew’s friend had a Wii and a full basement and two little brothers who idolize him. Our house had indoor plumbing, a fireplace, a few fake plants and a Play Station that boasts two broken Guitar Hero instruments.
Aaaaaand…the clues to the whereabouts of the dragon. You heard me, DRAGON CLUES.
Drew got this book series for Christmas, and he and his best cul-de-sac buddy spent the better part of Christmas break looking for dragon clues in the empty field behind our house. That’s all I had to explain to Cory before he was in the garage searching for parts he could assemble together so he could make dragon tracks in the snow, strengthening the boys’ theoretical evidence. The next day I ran into my neighbor at our clubhouse and she motioned me over and asked, “What were your husband and daughter doing yesterday out back?” Only then did I realize that there are no suitable words for explaining that your spouse and offspring were using duct tape and wood fragments to simulate a dragon footprint, but somehow I feel like it improved my credibility to be dressed in spandex, sweating to U2 and testing my relationship with the elliptical.
Something you should know about “Dragonology” is that inside the book they have a translation for the Dragon alphabet. For the last several days Cory has been slipping out of the house to write messages in the snow using the Dragon alphabet, thus introducing a fantastical conversation between boy and beast:
Who are you?
I am Thorn.
Where do you live?
Under the Flat Iron Mountain.
Can we meet?
This question has since been dumped on by a fresh layer of snow so the boys will have to wait for the answer, but the weekend tested Cory’s commitment when the boys announced their plan: at 7:00 pm on Saturday night they were going to take the neighbor’s night vision goggles and go out on the deck to see if they could spot the dragon. Suffice it to say, Cory’s commitment level is strong.
Minutes before seven o’clock, donned in a black turtleneck, a ski hat and his bagged accessories including a homemade torch, gasoline, and flammable hornet’s spray, Cory headed for the outdoors with instructions that if Drew asked his whereabouts that we tell him he had gone to get some gas for the car. Several moments later my front door burst open with two very animated boys yelling that, “THEY HAD SEEN THE DRAGON!!!” Apparently, Cory’s plan worked. Having situated himself a safe distance away he dipped the torch into some gasoline, sprayed it with the flammable hornet’s spray, and successfully convinced my son and his friend that they had witnessed a dragon exhaling his fiery breath into the chill of the night air. Retrieving the book, they furiously flipped through the pages of Dragonology to study the various species so they could accurately identify the specific dragon that they saw.
Am I married?
Yes.
Do I have children?
Yes.
How many?
Depends. On weekdays from 7am – 6:30pm I have one husband and two children. Weeknights and weekends, I am a single parent with three kids.
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