Light Refreshments Served

Stace (Mood/Emotive Guru/Value for the Dollar): Sammy’s has a simple, hip, creative atmosphere with meaty burgers, piles of fries (both spuds and sweet potatoes) and shakes all fairly priced for a total of $10-13. If you’re daring and looking for a fun, taste bud adventure take your kids to chat over a shared pie shake (great idea Drew!)! Or…. if you’re looking for a small local diner with live music try their Summer Spectacular series on Friday nights, eat outside and after dinner enjoy a free ice cream cone!

Kacy (Beverages/Ice/Topics Discussed): While Sammy’s does offer free refills, the pepsi machine is behind the counter which means you have to ASK for them. That’s not free to me. I like to get my own. Because I can drink a lot. And I want to drink a lot without shame. Pepsi instead of Coke? It’s a mistake, but not a fatal one.

Jenny (Celebrity Specialist): It’s not hard to figure out which celebrities would be found at Sammy’s because there are poloroids of them on the walls. Without studying those photos, however, I’m gonna go with Any Osmond (except Marie . . . shhhhhhhh), especially David, who happens to be friends with Sammy. Speaking of Davids, Li’l Mister Archuleta would (and likely has) enjoyed a pie shake or two. On any given day, I’d say George Wendt would happily spend the afternoon at the counter (on the corner seat, of course), contemplating which scripture tote to purchase. Seated in the far corner, just to Get Away From It All: Jon Gosselin (Kate brought in the entire brood last week and was completely Put Out that there wasn’t room for all her crew, and that she couldn’t get her food in three minutes).

Hailey (Shakes/Dessert Specialist): To say that I was disappointed that Sammy’s ice cream machine was broken is a gross understatement. Utterly and completely devastated is more like it. I had been looking forward to a Sammy’s pie shake for a whole week, as I had enjoyed it once in the past. I dreamed of banana cream pie goodness the night before and woke up hungry! So, I sat there and shed tears over my sweet potato fries, but invisible tears because it was Kacy’s birthday and I didn’t want to be the Debbie Downer. The worst part of it all is that, not two minutes after I left, my friend who was going in as we were leaving texted me to say that they were now serving shakes. Oh, the inhumanity!! Whatever. Get the banana cream pie shake when you go. IF YOU CAN. (I’m not mad.)

Lisa (Fries/Fry Sauce): Sammy’s has two choices: a battered “regular fry” (a thicker thin fry–believe me, that makes a lot of sense in my mind) and the “sweet potato fry.” When I asked the waitress which one I should order, she told me “do half-and-half!” Which I did and was thoroughly delighted and felt that I had eaten two, versus one, servings of vegetables that meal. I would order the half-and-half again and again. The fry sauce was homemade and thick. I ate it all. That should say it all.

Brett (Hipness/Coolness Factor): Whether or not you love the food at Sammy’s, there’s no denying the atmosphere there is very loose, welcoming and, ultimately college scene friendly. It’s not that they are trying to be “hip” either. Sammy’s owner Sam Schultz is a promoter and scene virtuoso. He’s been able to use his burger joint as a way to get the word out about talented local musicians by hosting evening concerts with Mindy Gledhill, Jarrett Burns, Jackie Tohn, The Jets and more, often for free or for a very low price. Check it out: http://sammyscafe.blogspot.com/

Topher (Burgers): I was more than happy with my hamburger at Sammy’s. I had “The Masterpiece.” At first I saw that it had BBQ sauce on it and I thought to myself, Gross. I hate BBQ sauce! And mixed with avacado and bacon? Now I’ve heard everything! But it was a wonderful combination. The hamburger was substantial and very meaty, as a hamburger should be. It didn’t taste like something I might make on my own grill at home, it tasted fancy, like something a famous person would make on their grill at their home. And Sammy’s is right in our own backyard! Please do not hesitate to try “The Masterpiece.” If you gobble it down in even half the time it took me, that’s a real achievement!

My only negative experience with this hamburger was when Kacy brought up the whole story about Gary Gilmour. And then I was thinking about a bunch of dead people while I was eating. But I quickly thought about something else. And it was Kacy’s birthday, so I guess she’s entitled to whatever story she wants to tell.

Happy Birthday, Kacy! Everyone should go and eat this burger (with two kinds of fries.).

One of our summer goals was to eat out at local burger places with friends and rate the food, decor, and cleanliness of the establishment (that’s for you, dad!) Just so you know we’re not all talk, here we are with our first post about a new local Utah burger joint, Stumpy Burger. I brought along some specialists. Each has their specific job and each gives their own specific little review.

Topher (Burgers): I really wish I had enjoyed my Stumpy burger a little more. I’m sorry to be Natty Negative. But the patties were really smashed together and shapeless. I really enjoy it when my patties are rounded. You know, like they have been freshly sliced off of the cow. Also, the oddness of the size and the texture of the meat were not helped by the carcass of a dead raccoon that someone had tacked to the wall. I know I wasn’t eating a raccoon, but it still gave me that “not so fresh” feeling. The proprieter of Stumpy’s was a real sweetheart. He was super nice to my kids, and that’s not something everyone can do. But he recommended this sauce called “Stumpy Sauce” and I did not enjoy that. Maybe someone else has already commented on this? It’s basically fry sauce with a lot of horseradish. I think it was supposed to be a super awesome surprising sauce that really packs a lot of flavor punch. But when you bit into your hamburger it just didn’t do anything. Remember when Bastian finally got to fly on the back of Falkor the luckdragon in The Neverending Story? Well, this wasn’t exciting like that at all.

Lisa (Fries/Fry Sauce): I think I should state, right off the bat, that I love a good skinny fry (ala McDonalds, if you must know). Stumpy’s fries are in between the “regular” skinny fry and the steak fry. They’re bigger than the Wendy’s fry. (Is this information useful to anyone?) So, I wasn’t crazy about the fry (what are you–fat or skinny? steak? homecut? Define yourself!) My main complaint, however, was that there weren’t enough of them. Am I contradicting myself? Yes, I am. Stumpy does, however, set itself above the rest with it’s own special sauce, for burgers and fries, made of horseradish, cayenne pepper, and mayo. It had a kick. People were dumping it all over their burgers and fries–they loved it.

Hailey (Shakes/dessert specialist): Since the Stumpy people informed me that they did not yet have shakes, I had to sample three different kinds of pie instead. I know, it’s rough, but someone had to do it. I really enjoyed the richness of both the Coconut Cream and Chocolate pies, but the Fresh Strawberry was too sweet for me (although, not for my two-year old.) All three slices were generously sized, so I appreciated that!

Jenny (Celebrity Analysis): It seems obvious that the first celebrity to fit in at Stumpy’s is Ted Nugent, sitting directly under the dead raccoon on the wall (the onions on his burger are not grilled; whether or not the meat on his burger is grilled is debatable). Ben Affleck sits at the table with the electronic gambling game (seriously, Ben? Yahtzee?). Who’s that standing in the corner? Why it’s Steve Martin and Ed Helms! Not eating burgers, but engaging in a friendly round of Dueling Banjos! And last but not least (no, really. Ted Nugent is least.), Heather Mills.

Amelia (Decor/Style): Stumpy’s decor left me (sorry about this) stumped. Some of it made sense. Pine tree garlands at the door and around counters, stuffed raccoons for sale, painted stars in the navy blue sky overhead, tree stumps, Stumpy’s. Got it. I even got the suspended canoe full of stuffed raccoons overhead that I assume were navigating the Missouri River. But not getting the Ikea graphic fabric panels on the walls (twisted and hung in odd configurations) and modern light fixtures. Close, but no cohesive concept. I’d lose the panels and install some jigged out tree shapes to fill the walls instead. Cheap to do, makes much more sense and still maintains the kitchy Mom and Pop factor that makes Stumpy’s the new cool place to eat.

Brett (Hip/Coolness Factor): Stumpy Burger has its look and feel down pat. They know their brand and that brand is raccoons. Now, raccoons, aka “coons,” aren’t currently recognized by the Hipster Foundation of America as cool but there may be just enough irony in the decor (pelts), presentation (furry tails on staff) and soundtrack (Ozark-style bluegrass) to attract them. Stumpy’s downtown location alone gives it points for coolness. (The truly hip rarely enjoy chain restaurants in strip malls.) The establishment may not have an old Nintendo set-up or blast Grizzly Bear, St. Vincent or Radiohead from the speakers but Stumpy Burger is “cool” in that they know who they are and embrace it.

Stumpy Burger is looking for artists, which is interesting. The owner was really nice. Extremely friendly and brought my kids otter pops at a crucial time in the dining process (the end). The place was full. “Jumping,” if you will.

Here’s Kacy saying “See you next time!”